Even if I fall, I will still fly again.

One of my favorite routes. Of course I will be there. Marked in big bold letters on my calendar, Bay to Bay 30K was going to be my first race of 2019, as well as my first 30K. It was going to be great!

But the past month has been anything but great...

One of my favorite routes - Camps Bay to Hout Bay

My year ended on a low after having another hard fall. Yes, another accident!! I was out running coming downhill past the V&A Waterfront in Cape Town. I was running on the pavement, going at quite a speed, when an Uber pulled up next to me. There wasn't enough time to see it coming or to stop...the next moment a door hit me on my chest and knees and I went flying back falling directly on the hard pavement with my back. I just laid there, shocked and uncertain of my injuries. I felt a sharp pain in my chest and saw the bruising on my knees as I slowly made my way up. The moment I got up the Uber drove away. "She is up so she must be fine!"

I wasn't.

The following week I experienced a lot of pain. I ended up spending my New Years in hospital getting an injection in my back. Thereafter, I decided to take a week off running to give my body time to recover. One week before my first race of 2019, I was able to start jogging again with the hopes to be ready to line up the next Sunday at the Bay to Bay 30K. My training prior to the accident went well and I felt confident after completing my last 28K long run in 1:48. However, I could feel my body wasn't ready yet, but I kept my hopes up right to the start of the race. I lined up with a positive mentality and knew I did the best I could to be ready despite the circumstances.

I was feeling very strong. Going up the mountain I felt comfortable and by the 9K mark, the second lady quite far behind me. I was on my goal pace and ready to increase the speed on my way back. Going down Suikerbossie, a very steep downhill, I felt a sharp pain in my back. It felt like my leg was giving in under me when I got to the bottom. I started slowing down drastically and the second lady began to catch up. By the half way mark she passed me. I tried following, but the shooting pain down my leg became unbearable. At 18km I knew that I had to stop, my race was over. I was devastated, as I was on pace to run a 1:45-50 for my first 30K. Tears rolled down my eyes as the ambulance came to pick me up and take me back to the medical tent.

This is a warning for all runners. Be cautious. Even when running on the pavement, you still have to be aware of your surroundings. Look out for the cars and any other hazards that may be on the road. Some people don't look or care, and then you are left with the scars...

I can't tell how many more times I will have to fall before I can fly...

But I won't stay down.

I will keep on getting back up.

I will keep on fighting.

I won't give up.

Fly butterfly

- Annie

ALL IN...

"Look If you had One shot Or one opportunity To seize everything you ever wanted In one moment Would you capture it Or just let it slip?"

- Lose Yourself, Eminem

Read Sport24: Nedbank name women's Dream Team for 2019

I remember when you walked into our running store, when you were only 14 years old and I asked you why you wanted to run. You answered: "I want to go to the Olympics!" - Bennie Stander, my coach.

I was only a little girl, but I knew what I wanted from the start. Growing up, running gave me purpose. It gave me reason to dream...to believe there is something bigger and better than just the pain I was experiencing while struggling with my illnesses. It made me feel like I was strong when I was weak and small.

Nine years later, physically and mentally I am a different girl, but inside I am still that same little girl that stepped into the running store...

I still want to go to the Olympics!

I decided that if I want to succeed I need to give my best shot. You only get one life and I know one day I will look back regretting not trying. I AM ALL IN! I decided to temporarily scale down my personal training career to run. I want to see how far I can go if I truly put in the training and the time I need to recover to make it to the top. I realized that I cannot be disappointed or dissatisfied with my racing or workout times if I spend up to 10 hours a day on my feet in the gym while training twice a day myself. I will only be seeing a few clients on the side of what my training and racing schedule allows. I am passionate about my job as a personal trainer and enjoy working with people a lot, but I know in my heart I am making the right choice.

I want to make my country proud and all those that believe in me and have helped me to come this far. I want to be able to look back without regret, knowing that I truly gave it everything I got.

I am doing this for that little girl, that saw the dream long before the rest of the world could.

Just do it, Just Run

- Annie

What I learned in 2018

In hospital, after my car accident on 17 January 2018

The one of the biggest lessons I can take away from 2018 is: "YOU WILL LEARN MORE FROM BEING ROCK-BOTTOM, THAN YOU WILL EVER LEARN FROM BEING AT THE TOP."

Life is precious and can change in an instant...when I was in my second car accident at the beginning of this year - my whole life changed in an instant!

I was BROKEN.

Financially - I just totaled my brand new car I saved up for years (I didn't have proper insurance yet either, only liability!) The financial burden dealing with all the debt, bills and having to buy a new car was too much.

Emotionally - Going through my second car accident in 3 years, alone in a foreign county, was very tough. I became very isolated and lonely.

Physically - Just recovered from my back injury and suddenly I was out again, unable to run due to concussion and whiplash.

Mentally - I had enough struggling and pain. I no longer wanted to live or run. I felt overwhelmed with feelings of guilt and resentment.

But...

Somehow I came back.

Somehow I managed to get back up.

Somehow every setback this year made me more motivated and determined to come back stronger.

I think the setbacks just make me realize that I want it more - it made me hungrier than before and pushed me to work harder for what I want! It helped me appreciate running even more than before. You realize how much it really means to you - it is so much more than just a sport to me. It's my sanity, my escape, my freedom, and my way of being me! Running connects me to other runners and people that share my passion for this sport.

It's never been easy managing my illnesses while running, but running has always given me a reason to fight for something and keep on going, even during times when my health wasn't good or when I had setbacks like injuries due to accidents. I really believe that I became stronger both physically and mentally as a result of all my obstacles.

Everyone has their own obstacles and things they go through - try to use those SETBACKS AND STRUGGLES TO SET YOU UP FOR SUCCESS.

Please comment below, what did you learn in 2018?

- Annie